Gifts from god for Feb 6, 2015

There were so many gifts from god this week. I feel blessed to be an American.

• West Virginia Republican says rape can be ‘beautiful’ if it produces a child… because God. 
• Via Rail terror suspects’ views ‘a complete desecration of my religion,’ trial told… Islam is not the problem. Don’t be hater. 
• Obama Condemns ‘Horrific Acts’ In The Name Of Religion… Wait, Christians do horrible things too? 
• Obama Calls For Balancing Free Speech With Respect For Religion… cause words hurt. No wait, that can’t be right. 
• Why Is There a Religious Exemption for Vaccinations? So they can feel good about infecting our children.
• Afro-Brazilian religions struggle against Evangelical hostility… There is only one true faith and it’s not yours. 
• Local pastor arrested for drunk driving… you mean pastor Don Vanderslice is just a normal irresponsible drunk?
• Slain priest’s son arrested in Mississippi, charged with murder… The pastor and his wife were allegedly beaten with a bad, lamp and hammer… by their son. 
• Muslims demand a teacher be fired for showing Charlie Hebdo cartoons. We live in the USA with freedom of speech and everything, right?
• Measles Outbreak Is A ‘Hoax’ Says Conspiracy Theorist Glenn Beck… A loon sent by god to fill people’s heads with nonsense. 
• Evangelists Plan to Convert Atheist Computers to Christianity… because there are not homeless people to feed.
• Republican Leaders Join Anti-Gay Extremists For Insane Documentary… Because Christianity demands we hate the gays. 
• Ken Ham Has Sued Kentucky Officials Because He Doesn’t Understand How the Law Works… God sends stupid people to build replica arks. Remember the homeless hungry masses Christians. Remember? You are supposed to do something about that. 
• ‘Christian’ Dad Shoots ‘Demon-Possessed’ Mentally-Ill Son In Chest: ‘He Better Call On The Lord’… If she’s a witch she will float. 
• Gatesville Youth Pastor Charged with Sexual Assault Asked for Forgiveness… Because the way it works with God is that you ask forgiveness and all is forgiven. It’s a good deal for scoundrels. I guess pastor Will Jackson qualifies as a scoundrel.
• Ex-Youth Pastor Arrested… Adam D’Albero is only a “Ex” pastor because he alleged molested a 13-year-old girl. 
• Browns burg pastor arrested in Goodwill theft… Wait. Pastors steal? Shame on you Pastor Denis Roy.
• Val Kilmer’s Family Says Christian Science Is Hurting His Health, Discourages Treatment… I think we all know how this will end. 
• Pat Robertson Says Non-Religious Children Should Be Beaten Until They Respect Christian Beliefs… I’m sure the bible says this someplace. This old coot would not just pull this out of his ass would he?
• Texas Fourth Grader Suspended For Threatening To Use Magic… Because God + Texas = Stupid. 

I could go on for days.