I don't get BDSM, but Greta does

I am a voracious reader. Books, magazines, news articles and blog posts all filter through my mind at a dizzying pace. I've read like this my whole life. Back in the day it was an armload of books from the local library. Today it is the Internet, Amazon, and Audible.

I was reading Greta Christina's blog recently. I have a thing for Greta. I love her writing. I read almost everything she writes, which is odd, because we exist at different ends of the social spectrum. I'm a middle-aged straight white male, which I do not think is her target audience. Her latest post is on Crowdsourcing a BDSM/King Resource Guide. I read the whole thing. 

I’m in the final stages of putting together my collection of erotic fiction — currently titled “Bending, and Other Dirty Kinky Stories About Pain, Power, Religion, Unicorns, and More” — and I could use some help.

I want to include a short resource guide at the end of the book, listing books, websites, forums, and other sources of information on how to do BDSM safely and consensually. But I’m a bit out of the loop these days: it’s not like when I was working at Blowfish and saw every new “how to do SM” book that came off the presses. So I’m crowdsourcing it.

After finishing my read, I thought, "Well fuck… there is something you don't see everyday." I'm not against BDSM, but I'm not for it either. I am just not interested in the subject in the slightest way. As far as I can remember, I've never been interested in BDSM. To me it's like the odd little man who gets off on shoes. Whatever blows your dress up brother. It simply does not blow my dress up at all. BDSM does nothing for me. I don't get it. That's ok though, I don't get lots of things. That does not make them wrong.

I recently told the story of how I discovered gay culture back in 1977 or 1978. At the time, I worked at Knott's Berry Farm behind the scenes and far away from the public. On one winter evening, I took my lunch break by walking out of my control booth and into the crowd to grab some nachos from a Mexican Village restaurant. I walked 10 or 15 yards into a crowd and stopped with mouth agape. I was surrounded by gay people in all manner of dress and all seemingly having the time of their lives. It was a huge party. I was lost. I had no idea what I had stumbled upon. Up until this point in my life, gay was a concept. Seeing reality up close was a total mindfuck. I was standing in the middle of thousands of gay people. I adapted by reaching out to few people. We talked about how significant the event was for the local community. A few of us went on to shared a meal together. We even danced to a live band. Well… they danced. I moved around erratically. 

The experience was an awakening. I later learned that I had friends in the crowd who were afraid that I would discover them and out them to their parent. Nothing like this happened even though at the time I was a rapped-tight Christian kid dreaming of becoming a pastor. Thankfully, that did not work out.

My point is, BDSM like gay culture is something I understand and accept, but also something that does nothing for me. Gretta's writing helps to expose me to subcultures I know little about, and I think that is why I love reading her work. She helps me understand things I would never think about or experience myself. I really must try to meet her one day. 

What gets my blood going? Dark-haired and curvy women do the trick. I think that's why I married one.