Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Annoying public prayer

I witnessed an odd thing the other day. Two women seated near me in a restaurant joined hands and then started to pray. Their table was in the middle of five other occupied tables, in the corner of a crowed dinning room. I see Christians pray frequently. It is no big deal. It's one of those ubiquitous parts of American life that is as normal as men shaving on the way to work. Normally, one sees it and says nothing. Except for this time. The women prayed for five minutes. They cried too. I saw them wiping tears. At times they would raise a hand toward the sky, and at other times they would raise the hands the held together. It was some kind of ritualized movement that seemed important to the process.

I noticed them pray, so did others. I think that was the point. It was important to the ladies that they witness to the restaurant through prayer. It was like they were putting on a little pre-meal Christian stage show just of the restaurant audience. I watched them until they finished. A few other dinners did the same. When they finished, they looked around. One of the women made eye contact with me and said, "Jesus loves you."

I whispered back in a voice much too low to hear, "Vacuum".

A few minutes later I bit down on a piece of calamari and broke a tooth. I am sure the two items were unrelated.

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Comments (9)

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Just more "cafeteria" religion. These women would zero in on the anti-gay verses in the Bobble, but totally skip over the place in the New Testament where Jesus reminds people to pray privately, rather than flaunting it in public to gain a pious reputation.

Sorry about your tooth. Sue the bastards.
divine retribution

you should be more careful what you say to the jesus freaks

TIC
I think you are absolutely right that the point of this is to be seen doing it. I always want to remind them that their bible is very clear about how they are not supposed to pray in public. Not that this would deter them in their quest for magic Jesus points.
First... what does "vacuum" infer? I wouldn't have known what it mean even if i had heard you.

May I suggest two things:
1st..the proper response to "Jesus Loves You" is " And zeus and his pantheon of gods and goddesses adore you I'm very sure".

2nd.. its the perfect time to refer the holier than thou bitch to Mark 6:6, which admonishes the devout to pray in private.

Feel free to write those down and use them liberally. Like a good boy scout, a good atheist must always be prepared.
1 reply · active 863 weeks ago
Vacuum looks like Fuck You when reading lips.
I will venture to guess that "vacuum" mouthed silently could easily be mistaken for an F-bomb for those whose little minds spend too much time in the gutter...am I right?

My mom (in her teen years) enjoyed sitting with my aunt in a restaurant and mouthing "Suffer much" to random people, just to see what their reaction would be.
Volly explains: " I will venture to guess that "vacuum" mouthed silently could easily be mistaken for an F-bomb..."

Well, if that is infact the case, it just raises the obvious question: why not just SAY "Fuck You!" and eliminate any possible misinterpretation? A perfectly natural response, and certain to spoil their shrimp cocktail.
1 reply · active 863 weeks ago
I do not cuss in front of my children... much.
Don't ya just hate it when kids impede a perfectly good opportunity to give a sanctemoneous-holier-than-thou theist some shit? Damnit!
;)

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