Monday, November 22, 2004

Why Nutballs?

ABC News: 5 Killed, 3 Hurt in Wis. Hunting Dispute

I am asked this question over and over by people who read my blog. What is it about nutballs that fascinates you? I think it is best to start with a definition of nutball. A nutball is a person, or group of people, who act in a way that a rational person would intuitively understand to be well… NUTS! Take the case of Chai Vang, a deer hunter who killed five other hunters on November 21. His actions are clearly outside of the bounds of normal behavior. At most, Vang should have yelled at the other hunters, then realized he was wrong and walked to a new place to hunt. Instead he opens fire on his fellow hunters, killing 5. Vang is a nutball. I do not mean he is insane. I am not a doctor and do nut even pretend to understand physiology. I mean, what he did was so wrong that any rational person would instantly know it to be wrong.

Another example is the Diana Duyser, who is trying to sell her “Virgin Mary” toast on eBay. It only takes a few minutes for any rational person to realize that anybody who keeps a piece of toast in a sealed Lucite container for 10 years in hopes that it is a holy relic, is well… a nutball. (Which reminds me, my son used to collect french fries…)

So, why do I pick on religious nutballs so much? The answer is easy, they give me so much to choose from, especially the Christian fundamentalists, and those misguided souls in a cult, or one of those “made up” religions, like Wicca. I was just reading the other day about a group wanting to convene their coven in a local school. Stories like this stick out as potential nutballs, and often they are so much more. Take the holy toast lady, Diana Duyser, she spawned a group of copy cats that are selling everything from “I ate the holy toast t-shirts”, to holy cheese burgers, holy onion rings, and holy replica Virgin Mary toasts.

Of all the groups that I watch, Fundamentalist Christians give me the most material. Their “the end is near” machinations and endless harping on tedious public issues, brings them to my reading list almost daily. In every case, the positions they take are so outside the mainstream that they tend to be comedy acts rather than something that is taken seriously. Take the Texas school science book warning about “Evolution being a controversial theory”. A rational person sees through the crap and says nutball. Fundamentalist pushed to put it in place to give credence to their asinine view that the world was created ten thousand years ago and that God’s hand was to guide our evolution as an “intelligent design”. Any rational person knows that the Theory of Evolution is a scientific fact and does not attempt to explain the origin of life on earth, but only how species evolved over time.

I can go on and on, don’t get me started.

19 comments:

Candy Girl said...

There's a word for this - ultrafidian.

passthebread said...

I think I like the term nutball. I agree everyone you call anutball is indeed a nutball. But then you add terms like "Christian Fundamentalist" as term and then add nutball. The people you call Christian Fundamentalist I do not think a Christian Fundamentalist would call a Christian Fundamentalist. What we call them is high maintenance congregants who often (seriously) do not take their medications. I am certainly a Christian Fundamentalist but only marginally a nutball.
P.S. I teach my children evolution as a fact.
brad

Mary Mapes said...

I think you like nutballs so much largely because you yourself are one maybe? Get a life dude... You're not going to "change the world" by ranting about things you don't know anything about to pass the time and make yourself feel important.

Mojoey said...

I hardly try to change the world nor do I suffer from self importance. I know a great deal about atheism – and even more about crazy Christian hate mongers. Instead of dwelling on the insanity you and your type provoke, I poke fun instead.

Change the world – that’s funny.

Tony said...

For amusement, I am sitting here watching Peter Popoff. I typed "divine transfer" and found your blog. A woman had money divinely transfered to her bank account,and everybody praised the Lord. Maybe it's just me, but I would have called the bank and told them of their mistake, because that money was probally "divinely" transfered from someone else's account.

mindflame said...

The rational person being you? A lot of people intuitively understand that homosexual acts and eating tofu are NUTS. I presume you think they are nutballs but you have no more reason to feel that way about them than they do about you. It might benieft you to actually get to know some real religious people (not just crazy people who have been kicked out of the local church) but real everyday religious people. You might come to understand that not everyone who don't think like you is stupid or crazy.

Mojoey said...

Mindflame - I know plenty of "real christian". It makes finding the nutballs that much easier.

Disillusioned nut. said...

You know, most people never take the time to read Darwin's journals. Unfourtunatly for the evolutionists, Darwin said "If we discover how the eye works, my theory is bunk."

I was really disillusioned when I read his journals. When you look at a Girrafe's neck, evolution seems pretty stupid.

Mojoey said...

Disillusioned nut,

You are the reason I write - thanks for posting.

Amelia's Voice said...

I listen often to very right wing religious channels and read my Bible whenever I can. I've read it cover to cover many times and have written fictional short stories about it. I'm tellin' you now, you need to read it more often; it is, by far, and without precedent, the most hilarious, outrageously funny book on the planet. If it were written today, no agent on earth would touch it; the book is that anally challenged.

billypseu said...

Wicca=made up? All religions=made up...?!? LOL, tell me which religion exactly≠made up...

Anonymous said...

Funny this guy:

The rational person being you? A lot of people intuitively understand that homosexual acts and eating tofu are NUTS. I presume you think they are nutballs but you have no more reason to feel that way about them than they do about you. It might benieft you to actually get to know some real religious people (not just crazy people who have been kicked out of the local church) but real everyday religious people. You might come to understand that not everyone who don't think like you is stupid or crazy.

No I don't think anyone who doesn't think exactly like me is stupid or crazy..but when someone actively denies reality(I get to live forever and the invisible sky daddy hates those I hate) or even dude hygenie is a conspiracy by soap manufacturers...they are a nutball. All theists(other than Deists) insist as absolute truth something that is in absolute contradiction to what is visible and known...so yes they are notballs. So is everyone who is so severly to the left or the right they deny obvious facts...they are nutballs. So do people who believe in astrology and Magick. I can think a person is wrong, sure...but it takes a special kind of wrong to be a nutball

Anonymous said...

nutball is too kind of a word, maybe something like cult followers is more fitting.

Anonymous said...

I find it hilarious that many of the people you accuse of being "nutballs" are intellectually superior and have a much more firm grasp on reality than you or make a greater contribution to society than you ever will.

I happen to be an atheist but I don't accuse believers of being "nutballs". Perhaps this is because I'm one of the many of those who are intellectually superior to you. That's hardly an exclusive club.

Mojoey said...

Anon - show yourself.

IrishYankee said...

I like NUTBALLS, and say it all the time...

MaJoey! keep doing what you are doing and never forget that camera!

Also, "... It might "benieft" you to actually get to know some real religious people...

love ya' brother! keep the good fight a'goin'!

respect,
IrishYankee

Kimminentdanger said...

I am a bona fide nutball (bipolar) and even someone as mentally feeble as I can recognize fiction when she sees it. Nutball? I prefer nutBAG, but when in Bethlehem... right?

@anonymous: Even Jesus wants you to shut the fuck up.

@Mary Mapes - insanity destroys neurotransmitters, not reason, logic or wit. Put down your copy of "Blog Posting For Hatemongering Dummies" and pick up a book that might actually teach you something... and no, not the Bible. Get something non-fiction.

@Mojoey: What Would Jesus Do.....
for a Klondike Bar???

If anyone needs me, I'll be in the basement smoking crack and shaking babies with Satan. HAH!

Thanks so much for your great posts... Kim

Sarah In Brooklyn said...

I just found your site by googling JEBUS -- another atheist blog came up that had the atheist blogroll on the side, which brought me here. I've only read a couple of things on your site so far so it may be too soon to comment, but I'm going to take a leap and praise Jebus that I found it -- looks like there's plenty of good readin' here (and I like how you responded to Disillusioned Nut above).
Best o' the natural world to you,
Sarah in Brooklyn

mizcreant said...

Don't know how I found your site, but am happy to say I found it. Oh, hey, I also found god! His prodigal son is still a prick, and his arbiters, Yea, those nutballs AKA priests are STILL molesting adolescents, prepubescents, and probably other escents that we've yet to discover. I know most of you already know that. Thanks atheists for illuminating a world still in the shadows of medieval world views. WE shall overcome! THEE shall be abolished!